Thoughts

 Starting a sentence with something attention grabbing is hard. I feel our attention spans are only in short bursts and any longer than 30 seconds of content our minds immediately need to move onto the next thing. Long form content is the new background noise to push us along whatever household chore or work task we're trying to complete. Not to enlighten or teach us something but to trick our minds into thinking the thing we're doing is going faster than it really is or to somehow keep us company. Fill space.

 I know some people can read books and listen to music at the same time. I am not one of those people. If there is music playing, it can't have words in it if I'm reading, or it has to be quiet. The last book I read took me a month to read. It was the final book (supposed to be the last book in the series, but after reading it I'm not so sure now) and I wanted to make it last as long as possible. It made me sad, then angry and then shattered all the expectations I had about what was going to happen. I was left being that meme shouting "DISAPPOINTED" out loud to nobody.  

Now, if I'm painting or drawing something. I can listen to music or have a video playing on in the background, only as noise. No life changing, thought provoking subject matter, maybe a rerun of some old show I used to watch and forgot existed. Half the time I couldn't tell you what song I was listening to unless I paused it to read the title. 

Getting someone to read something and stick with it till the end. That's tough. I admire authors who have millions of readers who eagerly await to find out about their favorite characters and lose themselves in stories of fantastic beasts. I aspire to be like that one day. To have an audience who foams at the mouth waiting and longing to find out what happens next, that's the kind of story I want to tell. Eventually. One day. 

For now I'll write things like this, to people like yourself, who have nothing better to do than to read this sitting on the john. So with that I'll leave you with this.. Don't forget to wash your hands. 

No Expectations

 I just watched a video about fourteen reasons why you shouldn't start a blog. I thought it would be stupid, but the first reason they gave made me laugh "Nobody knows who you are, and nobody cares about what you have to say" -so- true. I had a blog back when myspace was a thing. Nobody read what I wrote back then and I highly doubt anybody will read this now. I tried having a blog on tumblr but I clearly never kept up with it. This blog was something I had started way too long ago, during a time I really don't wanna remember and wrote stuff I'm rather embarrassed to say I wrote. Nothing too terrible but more cringe than I want to admit. A friend of mine, we'll call him, Clever Egg. He would encourage me to write more and even thought I should write a book. I threw that idea around and stopped and started and restarted trying to hash out this story that is now a distant memory in a land far far away. -Ahem- I digress. The book never took off, but that I didn't mean I stopped writing. I journaled -a lot-. I wrote unjudged and unhindered in one of those steno notepads. All the hurt, anger, good things, bad things, and ugly things all got scribbled down in-between those blue lines. Clever Egg has been one of the only people to read the things I've written and gave me feedback that challenged me rather than just say I did a good job. Now, this has been several years ago. Clever Egg is still around but as all things time and life happen. I am however going to show a few people this post including him. I wonder if I've improved since 2013, haha. I guess we'll see. 

So the point of all this, I've rambled on enough and if you've made it to this point, thank you! Gold star for you. In more words than needed, I'm throwing spaghetti on the wall. These last two years, have gone on and on and on, and I'm tired of saying I'm going to do this or that and never doing any of it. I've got no expectations for this to blow up or even get an honorable mention in any thing that means anything to anyone. I'm just a human behind a keyboard with thoughts and opinions that nobody cares about except me. I guess I figure if someone somewhere smiles a little or laughs a little or I don't know kills time sitting on the pot and this gives them something to do before they gotta go back to whatever then that's cool. I'm okay with supplying bathroom reading material.

I'm not gonna stick to any crazy posting schedule. I don't have lofty ideas of  breaking into the blogger space and somehow make a ton of money. I legit have no idea how that even works and I have a full time job. I also am not going to stick with one topic. My brain jumps around like a kid hyped up on sugar before bed. I have many interests and many hobbies. Also I am trying to read this year, things I've never read before such as Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams, and other book I find interesting or gets recommended. So I may write something about the books I read. 

Whelp. I've made my first post. There I feel accomplished. I'm going to attempt to find something to do before I head to bed. Laters <3